


In the Sunny Spot

by astrangerenters



Category: Arashi (Band), Japanese Actor RPF
Genre: Angst, Divorce, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-08
Updated: 2012-04-08
Packaged: 2017-11-03 06:45:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/378482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astrangerenters/pseuds/astrangerenters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She asks about Arashi and his drama, and he doesn't ask about her personal life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In the Sunny Spot

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the J-actress meme on Livejournal

It's difficult to stand by her side as the cameras flash, and her smile never falters. The producers have even implied that Sho and Director Fukagawa could finish up the remainder of the promotional period. Her absence would be understandable, but she's told them no. 

"It's my responsibility to be here," she'd said before they'd gone on stage earlier. "I'm proud of this movie."

Then when everyone had nodded and left her alone, he'd stood there in the hallway, waiting to be called onto the stage to greet the press. "Aoi-chan," he'd said, and her look then had been so sharp, so unlike her that it shut him up immediately.

Now they hold their microphones, answer questions, express their wishes that those assembled will enjoy Kamisama no Karute. Sho's done this before, and Aoi-chan has too. Smile and show no fear, even if you're crumbling inside. 

Her marriage is in a precarious situation, the man she's loved for so many years has faltered so gravely. The media is having a field day, speculating about him. Speculating about her. Does Miyazaki-san support her husband's beliefs? Does she condone his behavior? 

And still she smiles.

"Miyazaki-san," a reporter says, "what is Haruna's appeal point? What do you like about the character?"

"Her husband works so hard," Aoi-chan says without a moment's hesitation. "Many other wives would feel neglected, maybe overwhelmed. But Haruna stays by his side."

"Do you identify with Haruna?" another reporter asks, and the question isn't really about Haruna at all. Sho wants to intervene, but she's faster than he is.

"She's very strong," Aoi-chan admits. "It's enviable."

It's a few moments before any other reporter can come up with another question, and Aoi-chan's smile remains. But Sho can't look at it any longer.

\--

In October, she invites him for a meal, and it's not until November that he's able to find time in his schedule to meet with her. A three hour gap between Arashi responsibilities and drama responsibilities. Her eyes are bright, as they had been every day they'd filmed the movie. The same as when they'd filmed their CMs together.

She frowns at the bulky coat he arrives in. "Sakurai-kun," she chides him. "I can't tell their condition."

"What condition?"

"Your shoulders," she says. "What's the angle today?"

He shrugs out of the jacket and poses before taking his seat across from her. "You tell me."

"Sloping," she says with a nod. "Again."

She asks about Arashi and his drama, and he doesn't ask about her personal life. When the meal ends, he insists on paying even though she invited him.

"We're not living together," she says almost as an afterthought when he helps her into her jacket. "I'm living alone now."

"Oh," Sho says, at a complete loss for words.

She turns around, buttoning the jacket. There's no crowd of reporters this time, so she doesn't bother to smile. "It was nice to see you again, Sakurai-kun."

"Aoi-chan," he blurts out.

"Yes?"

"I'm busy. And I know that you are, too. But..." He leaves it for her to interpret what follows after.

She squeezes his arm. "Thank you. I'll remember that."

\--

In the last week of December when there are Kouhaku rehearsals and he spends every waking hour at NHK, he checks the news in spurts on his phone. On the 28th, the news comes through that Aoi-chan and her husband have officially registered their divorce.

She has a lot of friends. And a lot of people she's co-starred with. And family. So he doesn't expect her to call him of all people. His expectations are proven correct. 2012 begins, a fresh new year, a fresh new start, and the only thing that comes from her is a New Year's card wishing him the very best in the year to come.

Sho can't remember what he even wrote on the card for her, and it frustrates him. He waits until February when the tour is over, inviting her for a meal when their schedules sync up. It takes until the end of the month, and they meet at the same restaurant.

He's losing weight for his drama, and he pokes at his food, and she doesn't seem in the mood to tease him about his shoulders this time. The DVD for the movie has finally been released and with that, the last tangible thread of their professional connection unless they are able to work together again.

The year for her has been full of ups and downs, but she seems calm and relaxed and instead of the big lying smile that characterized their stage greetings in August, her face is serene. 

"Are you well?" he asks when their dessert and coffee orders have been placed.

"I am well," she replies agreeably. "Your hair is short."

He grins. "Not every role requires a perm the likes of Kurihara-sensei's."

"Sakurai-kun, I am not busy tonight. Are you?" she asks suddenly.

He shakes his head. "No, Aoi-chan. I'm not."

\--

Her apartment is clean, and during the day, she explains to him, there's plenty of natural light. She tells him that when scripts come, she likes to sit on the floor and let the sunshine pour through onto the pages as she reads them.

"What if it's a sad movie?" he asks her, standing in her favorite spot with the glow of the Tokyo night outside.

She shrugs. "Then I sit here even longer."

He leaves everything up to her, and they stand together in her living room for several minutes without speaking. He remembers the early morning shoots over a year and a half ago, her teasing, her kindness. The long days and the emotion of Kurihara's story. He doesn't love her, can't claim to love her because he doesn't know her enough, but he thinks she deserves to be happier than she is, and he thinks that she can sense those feelings.

He is obediently still while she stands before him, little fingers unbuttoning the shirt he'd worn to dinner. She makes a face when his shoulders are bared. "They're at quite an angle today," she says. Her hands trace the sharpened bones of his face. "My goodness, you've lost some weight everywhere."

She's in a blouse and a long skirt, and she kneels down on the carpet, pulling him down too. "Are you lonely?" he wonders aloud.

"Don't ask me that," she replies and moves so that she's on her back on the floor. "Sakurai-kun."

She only has to call to him once. He doesn't bother with her skirt, instead just shoving it up until it bunches at her hips. Her eyes are shut when he pulls her nylons off, his fingernail snagging in the fabric and he mutters an apology. He doesn't know who she's really imagining, but he somehow hopes it's him.

"Are you on..."

"...I am, please don't worry." When he moves to unzip his pants, she stays his hand briefly with a smile. "Don't call me Haru."

"I wasn't planning to, Aoi-chan."

"Good," she says agreeably, releasing him.

She doesn't kiss him so he doesn't kiss her, but she wraps her legs around his back while he moves within her and her fingers dig into his shoulders. Her body is small and warm, and she eventually opens her eyes to watch him. When he comes, she doesn't let him go, keeping their bodies together. 

"You didn't call me Haru."

"But you said not to!" he laughs. "Should I call you Haru next time then?"

He doesn't love her, can't claim to love her, but he's here, and she knows.

She smiles genuinely, and it's perfect.


End file.
